Separating triplets in school. It’s a controversial topic and there are pros and cons to each side. With our children being only three years old, I didn’t think I would have to consider it for quite some time. Turns out, I was wrong. We had to make the decision just a few short weeks ago.
When you have triplets, you naturally begin to think about things in threes. Three cribs, three bicycles, three college tuitions.
One of the other things that you think about (aside from the number of diapers you’re going to have to change) is all of the fun things they will get to do together.
I pictured family outings to the zoo, little league, and the first day of school.
Our family learned pretty early on that we wouldn’t always be doing things together. At five weeks of age, my girls came home from the NICU without their brother. While we were so blessed to have them home, our family felt fractured for those next three weeks before Lincoln came home. It was heartbreaking.
Over the years, we’ve had other firsts that didn’t come in threes. Violet got glasses. Lincoln had surgery. Keira took her first steps months before her brother and sister.
Most recently, we celebrated the first day of preschool…for two of them.
A couple of weeks ago, my girls donned their uniforms and held their “First Day of School” sign on the front porch. All the while, Lincoln stood back and watched.
In order to transition into the 3-year-old preschool class, the kids have to be potty trained. Lincoln is not.
About half the time he poops, he does so in his pants. And tells no one.
When I was asked whether or not I wanted to split them up, I didn’t think twice. My gut instinct was, “Yes, why wouldn’t I?” My husband and I decided long ago that we were going to treat our children as individuals as much as we were able.
What I didn’t anticipate is how much the split would affect me. Each day, my daughters become closer friends. They laugh and share songs and games they learned in school. And my son, who is a loner by nature, becomes more and more isolated from them. It’s tough to watch.
Lincoln is making progress, and hopefully he will join his sisters in the near future. Until then, I just keep reminding myself that they are individuals. They will move at their own pace through life. And it will be ok.
Hello there! I’m Krysta. If you’re new to The Thoughtful Mom, welcome! And thank you for stopping by.
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